Dealing with Anger: Ask God for Help - Day 80

Dealing with Anger: Ask God for Help
Day 80

You may feel helpless in the face of your anger. You cannot deal with it on your own. The most important step you can take is to ask God for help.

"God will give you the opportunity to be angry," says Rev. Noel Castellanos. "He's not going to take that freedom away from you, but when you're done, behind all of that stuff you don't understand, there's a loving God who can redeem any situation. You can allow that deep anger in an authentic, honest way to be converted into a plea for help."

Give your burden of anger to God, and He will give you rest.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (Matthew 11:28-30).

Lord Jesus, I give my anger and my struggles to You. I come to You to learn and to rest. Amen.

~ I am still amazed each day that these emails are talking to me. It is like I think I am past the anger and then I remember that I haven't let it ALL go.

I still hold resentment and anger towards my brother-in-law. I feel like he didn't take good care of my sister. I can't blame him for her not going to the doctor and such. I blame him for not helping her boys by getting them in therapy. I blame him for bringing this whore into the house less than two months after my sister was buried. Okay, she might not be a whore since they are now married. I have very little respect for a woman that would weasel her way into a situation with a widow and two kids that haven't had time to digest the loss of their mother. The fact that he lied to me to my face when this heifer was sitting in my sister's spot on the couch next to him. She wasn't even respectful nor was she like a normal person who would speak when spoken to or just introduce yourself. Maybe she was scared of me, she needed to be. I still hold a lot of resentment and anger towards that situation and honestly I don't know that I will ever get over it. I have decided that talking to him isn't going to happen so I will most likely just write a letter and get it out of my head and off my heart so that I can move forward. His actions and the hurt of seeing someone new in my sister's house and then my sister's belongings being just put away or thrown away by her are just beyond me. I can give it to God and pray that these negative thoughts and this anger of wanting to punch her in the face and cut off his penis will go away.

I still hold resentment towards my stepdad for leaving my mom the way he did, for not coming to the hospital when we told her she was there and for not coming when we told her that she was declining fast. He didn't even come to say goodbye. Perhaps when he walked out on our family, it was his way of saying goodbye for good, and that is sad because I wasn't raised that way. I was raised that when your family needs you .. you go to them. When you are down and out, your family will be the one to help lift you up and yet he didn't come. It was hurtful and felt spiteful. He didn't just walk out on my mom, he left my sister, me and Justice. He had been a part of my life since I was 12. It isn't like he wasn't my other dad. That is a hard pill to swallow. Not only did my own dad leave my mom when I was 2, my stepdad left my mom when I was 32.

So, not only am I getting a sense of anger in me still, but a very strong feeling of abandonment. Daddy issues. Lord help me.