Since the death of your loved one, you've started a journey. It's not a trip you planned, but it's a trip you must take.
As you complete this session, you'll begin to discover the answers to the following questions:
- Where is God in all this?
- Why do I feel so alone?
- Why is this pain so intense and immobilizing?
- Am I taking too long to grieve?
Expect God to show you that He is with you on this journey of grief.
"Be whoever you are. Your own pattern of grief will be your pattern of grief." -- Dr. Larry Crabb
Your Journey of Grief is Unique
Your grief won't resemble others'
What helps you won't help others
Don't question your love for the one you've lost
What Shapes Your Journey of Grief?
Your relationship ships your journey
The amount of time spent grieving before a loved one dies shapes your journey
Your efforts to heal shape your journey
Complete the five tasks of grief
FIVE TASKS OF GRIEF
- Accept your loved one's death
- Release your emotions
- Store memories
- Separate identity
- Reinvest in life
Your Journey of Grief Can Seem Unending
Don't rush through grief
Dealing with those who try and rush your grief
Your Loss is Deeper Than You Thought
You've lost more than your loved one
How to inventory your losses
Grief attacks you when you least expect it
What you should do when ambushed in the presence of others
"People around you don't understand grief unless they've been through it themselves." -- H. Norman Wright
Grief Affects Your Relationships
You may be too tired for your friends
You may be overwhelmed by well-meaning friends
You may need to write a grief letter to your friends
You may need help writing and distributing your grief letter
Frequently Asked Questions about the Journey of Grief
Will this pain ever end?
Will my life ever return to normal?
Does a new normal mean forgetting?
What should I do with belongings?
From Mourning to Joy - The Journey of Grief
Exercises to help you grow and heal
By completing this week's workbook exercises, you will start to ...
- learn the value of bringing your questions to God
- be assured of the goodness of God and His unchanging character
- examine grief's effects on you
- let yourself grieve in your own way
Day 1
Questioning God; feeling He has abandoned you
God's Word to You
"My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" (Psalm 22:1)
Do you feel that God has abandoned you? If so, how has that feeling impacted you?
Think about your life. Recall and list examples of how God has been present in your life.
Why is it good to ask God questions that are worrying you?
Remember
Questioning God during grief is not an expression of doubt or a sin. Don't hesitate to ask God to help you make sense of how a good God would allow bad things to happen.
Talking to God
God, I don't get it. Why did You let this happen? If You say You love us so much, why would You allow this? What am I missing here? Help me to reconcile what I know is true about You with my experience.
In Your Life
What questions do you have for God?
List some resources (people, books, support groups, etc.) that will help you find answers to your questions.
Day 2
God never changes
God's Word to You
"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." (Hebrews 13:8).
We know from the Bible that Jesus is God. For you, what is the significance of God's unchanging character?
How can an unchanging God help you handle the biggest challenge you are facing?
Remember
During grief, there are two things you can be sure of. One, your emotions will change. And two, God won't. He has always been there for you; He is here for you now; and He will never leave you. Go to Him.
Talking to God
Lord God, nothing has been the same since that day. I often don't know if I'm about to cry or crumble. Every step I take is uncertain. Please carry me.
In Your Life
One change you may face is the changing attitudes of people around you who are trying to "help" you. Sometimes they will be patient and caring; other times they will seem to be rushing you through grief. If this happens, why will it be important to remember that God does not change?
Day 3
How grief affects you
God's Word to You
"Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief." (Psalm 31:9).
How is grief affecting you physically and emotionally?
How is grief affecting your spiritual life?
Remember
Grief affects every aspect of your life. Remember to take care of your body as well as your soul. You have to put effort into the healing/grieving process, even if it's only one small step at a time.
Talking to God
God, sometimes I feel overwhelmed and unable to function. With Your strength, I can take small steps forward every day. Give me the strength to tend to all my needs -- emotional, spiritual and physical, and give me the courage and humility to ask for help as often as I need it.
We know from the Bible that Jesus is God. For you, what is the significance of God's unchanging character?
How can an unchanging God help you handle the biggest challenge you are facing?
Remember
During grief, there are two things you can be sure of. One, your emotions will change. And two, God won't. He has always been there for you; He is here for you now; and He will never leave you. Go to Him.
Talking to God
Lord God, nothing has been the same since that day. I often don't know if I'm about to cry or crumble. Every step I take is uncertain. Please carry me.
In Your Life
One change you may face is the changing attitudes of people around you who are trying to "help" you. Sometimes they will be patient and caring; other times they will seem to be rushing you through grief. If this happens, why will it be important to remember that God does not change?
Day 3
How grief affects you
God's Word to You
"Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief." (Psalm 31:9).
How is grief affecting you physically and emotionally?
How is grief affecting your spiritual life?
Remember
Grief affects every aspect of your life. Remember to take care of your body as well as your soul. You have to put effort into the healing/grieving process, even if it's only one small step at a time.
Talking to God
God, sometimes I feel overwhelmed and unable to function. With Your strength, I can take small steps forward every day. Give me the strength to tend to all my needs -- emotional, spiritual and physical, and give me the courage and humility to ask for help as often as I need it.
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