Shock Day 16

Shock
Day 16

Shock is a sudden, violent disturbance to the body. The same term is used to describe the effect of an electric current passing through the body. You have likely encountered this paralyzing reaction in grief.

Dr. Norman Peart describes his feelings after the death of his grandmother: "The immediate feeling was that of shock and an awareness that I was not as in control of the worlds as I once thought. then it was a numbness, a realization that there's something missing from life now. There was also a great fear as to who could be taken next from my life."

Virgil, who lost his wife, says, "When you go to a funeral, you hear people say, 'Oh, he's holding up so well.' I don't think that's true. I think the person in grief doesn't know what's going on. That's the state I was in." Maybe you can relate to how Virgil felt.

When you are in shock and you feel powerless to cope and unable to think straight, understand that you don't have to at that moment. Yet because of this, it is wise not to make any major changes in your life or decide on any important issues until your shock has subsided.

God will gently lead to safety those who consciously turn to Him and are dependent on His guidance.

"The LORD will give strength to His people; the LORD will bless his people with peace" (Psalm 29:11 NASB).

O Lord, my feet have been swept out from under me, but in Your loving arms I am steady and secure. Amen.

~ I wish I had had the time to really get out of my shock before making some decisions. I was forced to find an apartment and move out of our house just two months after my mom died.  It was not nearly long enough to be able to go through the things in the house. I gave away things that I might have otherwise kept. I miss having some of those things now. I can't live in regret over it, but accept it and move on from it. I understand now why they tell you not to make any rash decisions or life changing decisions just after you lose someone.  I can't remember the memorial mass that we had for my mom. I just remember getting up and reading the poem that I read at my sister's funeral. I don't remember much of talking to people at my sister's funeral either. I don't remember who all I saw or talked to at her wake, but I remember being there. I was just putting something my drawer in my filing cabinet at work and I happened to look down and there was the obituary for my sister. It is a reminder, as if I didn't know, that she isn't here anymore.  *tear* I miss her very essence and laughter.  Lord give me strength. It is times like this that I want to withdraw and not continue on the path that I am on. I want to hermit crab back into a false reality where my new reality is but a nightmare and my mom and sister aren't gone.  Today will NOT defeat me. This is what they call an "ambush" and it certainly was. I was just in the cabinet to get a protein shake because I am on liquids and I need something since I am hungry now. Yet, now that I have this rush of emotions, my hunger has left me. :(  This will get easier. This mourning will turn to joy. I will smile again. I will feel happiness again. After all, it IS God's promise.