Don't Rush Me - Day 22

Don't Rush Me
Day 22

Sometimes other people try to help you get out of your grief by offering advice or "constructive criticism." They may admonish you to "get over it" or to "get back into life." These comments can hurt.

Remember, you have an insight into the grieving process that these people do not have. You know that the length of the grieving process is different for each person. You know you have to let the grieving process take place, because if try and rush it, you will only prolong the healing.

"So many people will say: 'Well, it's been six months. Don't you think you should be over it by now?' But for each person it's different, and to say those things is very hurtful because maybe that person isn't ready," says Emy, a widow.

You cannot rely on other people to say the right words and provide the right comfort, but you can rely on God.

Job's "friends" condemned him and did not understand his grief. "Then Job replied: 'I have heard many things like these; miserable comforters are you all!'" (Job 16:1-2).

Father God, I know that my friends and family mean well, but they just don't understand that I am not there yet. Help me to know when I am.

Holy Spirit, You are my Comforter. In You alone will I find refuge. Amen.

~ Too many times did I hear that I needed to move on. Too many times did I hear "they would want you to be happy" as if I was being miserable to keep their memory alive.  Misery doesn't love company. Not in my world. I didn't want other people to feel what I was feeling. I didn't want other people to try and fix me. I just wanted someone who would listen or give me a hug. Just listen and not even talk back. Just let me vent and know that what I am saying I am saying from a place of true hurt and emotions. It takes a special person to be that person. I have one person that I can talk to and well, I also have my sister at the cemetery. I can go there and vent and cry and say the things that I would otherwise keep to myself for fear of repercussion.  I shouldn't fear the responses of others based on my world of hurt and my grief journey. I can't expect that any one person would know my hurt or be able to heal it. I can just know that when the process, the journey is over, I will be in a better place and be able to help others because I would have succeeded in going through it and be more empathetic towards others. I already feel like I am on a mission to better myself so that I can help others. I don't know my life's purpose still, but I feel like I was put here to help others. Maybe this is where I am to help others. I don't know God's plan, but I know that I am on this path and in this journey for a reason and He will bring me through it since He brought me to it.